Wednesday, June 18, 2008
week 4 of the holidays. im getting lazy.its pretty tragic how just a little more than a month ago we all heaved a huge sigh of relief and stuffed out textbooks away. ...or burnt them.and in less than 5 days its all coming back. the pressure. the torment. the stress. the eerie feeling that, confined within the walls of the institution youre enrolled in, anything can happen. and all you can do is watch your back....i dont wanna go back to school!!!!fudge.well every end comes after a long hard struggle. and every struggle starts with a beginning. and that beginning starts after sunday. scary huh.well not really. cus not having done anything academically-involved yet this holidays...im pretty much done for already.so church camp. it was a pretty great experience. looking back at it now i kinda miss it. like the whole idea of sitting on a chair on a beach facing a sea which, unlike those in singapore, actually has a horizon.cus in such peace there is clarity....lots and lots of sandflies too, but clarity.and coming to think of it. all our lives its like were running this huge long marathon. like from day one were pushed towards a single destiny...achievement. to excel. to outweigh. and daily we push forward, running through our 24 hours each day with a regime crafted out to help us, step by step, attain new skills, new positions, new credibility.new identities.maybe not so in other societies where a laid-back lifestyle is adopted without so much of social disapproval, but in singapore what is expected of everyone, not only the youth, is the never-ending strive for success. perseverance and ambition. to keep a goal in mind and push everything to achieve it.and im not saying that such ambition is unfounded. for, perhaps, in a young, blossoming society such as this, the need to stay ahead of our peers and competitors is far greater than that of a country that has established itself in world history for centuries. millenia, perhaps. and having a goal in ones life that one can reach toward is irrefutably one of the essential ingredients for a meaningful life. comforting, it may be too, at times, to have something to look forward to in the course of the otherwise mundane existance we lead. the best is yet to be =)and yet...success is not everything. far from it, actually.pastor Philip shared something on the 3rd night. and amongst many other points he raised, none being less important and significant that the previous, one really stuck out.'in all we do, we either do them by purpose...or by grace'...or something like that. yeahhhh.and it really spoke to me. really, in the course of life, its not Gods desire for each and every one of us to excel and overachieve. sure, we are to strive for His greatness and His plan in our lives...but He knows that, imperfect we are in nature, we cannot hope to be flawless in what we do.and thus, He calls us to live by grace.for by His grace, we feel not the need to stand above others, lifted up what we have done, but to soar in His name with our brothers and sisters in Christ...on wings like eagles.God calls us not to dedicate our existance to every task that is placed before us, and every issue we are to attend to...for undertaking everything assigned to us simply is a weight to surmountable for us to bear. instead, He calls us to dedicate our lives to Him, and not to strive for worldly success. For our portion is HimAnd we are more than blessedthinking about it...it gives light to the phrase 'i can do all things through Christ who strengthens me'. being Christian doesnt make us invincible. faith in Jesus bring about its own set of issues and challenges. but God doesnt call us to push through all of them on our own. for some of the struggles we face themselves are brought about by mans ineccesant desire for success.to live by grace...and do our best. and let God do the rest.anyway...camp was a great experience. as most june camps are. lots of free time. too bad little people came to share it with me =(.sooo...i spent time in the gym =)the guoman hotel gyms really like a workout corner. 3 separate glass huts containing cardio machines, assisting weight machines and free weights respectively. it was pretty awesome cus i was like the only person in the gym. aside from Glen.and it seems kinda sad that i spent a vacation...gymming. but i got quite alot done.now 2.4s 9:35. just 1 min 5 seconds left to shave off.aside from that, it was kinda just a nice 4 days to make new friends...and get to know old ones better.ohhh i watched this show on the second night there. at least a little of it. its called Elizabethtown. its pretty cool. first thing i saw when i watched it was these 2 dudes in bathrobes hugging. and one of them was Orlando Bloom. thats pretty much enough to get me hooked.its one of those shows with its own culture. and its real addictive.I don't need that girl by my sideI don't need that girl in my lifeI don't want to talk it outor hold her when she criesI don't want to tell herthat I love her more than lifemore than life