I give my all to You

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

week 4 of the holidays. im getting lazy.

its pretty tragic how just a little more than a month ago we all heaved a huge sigh of relief and stuffed out textbooks away.

...or burnt them.

and in less than 5 days its all coming back. the pressure. the torment. the stress. the eerie feeling that, confined within the walls of the institution youre enrolled in, anything can happen. and all you can do is watch your back.

...i dont wanna go back to school!!!!

fudge.

well every end comes after a long hard struggle. and every struggle starts with a beginning. and that beginning starts after sunday. scary huh.

well not really. cus not having done anything academically-involved yet this holidays...im pretty much done for already.

so church camp. it was a pretty great experience. looking back at it now i kinda miss it. like the whole idea of sitting on a chair on a beach facing a sea which, unlike those in singapore, actually has a horizon.

cus in such peace there is clarity.

...lots and lots of sandflies too, but clarity.

and coming to think of it. all our lives its like were running this huge long marathon. like from day one were pushed towards a single destiny...achievement. to excel. to outweigh. and daily we push forward, running through our 24 hours each day with a regime crafted out to help us, step by step, attain new skills, new positions, new credibility.

new identities.

maybe not so in other societies where a laid-back lifestyle is adopted without so much of social disapproval, but in singapore what is expected of everyone, not only the youth, is the never-ending strive for success. perseverance and ambition. to keep a goal in mind and push everything to achieve it.

and im not saying that such ambition is unfounded. for, perhaps, in a young, blossoming society such as this, the need to stay ahead of our peers and competitors is far greater than that of a country that has established itself in world history for centuries. millenia, perhaps. and having a goal in ones life that one can reach toward is irrefutably one of the essential ingredients for a meaningful life. comforting, it may be too, at times, to have something to look forward to in the course of the otherwise mundane existance we lead. the best is yet to be =)

and yet...success is not everything.

far from it, actually.

pastor Philip shared something on the 3rd night. and amongst many other points he raised, none being less important and significant that the previous, one really stuck out.

'in all we do, we either do them by purpose...or by grace'

...or something like that. yeahhhh.

and it really spoke to me. really, in the course of life, its not Gods desire for each and every one of us to excel and overachieve. sure, we are to strive for His greatness and His plan in our lives...but He knows that, imperfect we are in nature, we cannot hope to be flawless in what we do.

and thus, He calls us to live by grace.

for by His grace, we feel not the need to stand above others, lifted up what we have done, but to soar in His name with our brothers and sisters in Christ...on wings like eagles.

God calls us not to dedicate our existance to every task that is placed before us, and every issue we are to attend to...for undertaking everything assigned to us simply is a weight to surmountable for us to bear. instead, He calls us to dedicate our lives to Him, and not to strive for worldly success.

For our portion is Him
And we are more than blessed

thinking about it...it gives light to the phrase 'i can do all things through Christ who strengthens me'. being Christian doesnt make us invincible. faith in Jesus bring about its own set of issues and challenges. but God doesnt call us to push through all of them on our own. for some of the struggles we face themselves are brought about by mans ineccesant desire for success.

to live by grace...and do our best. and let God do the rest.

anyway...camp was a great experience. as most june camps are. lots of free time. too bad little people came to share it with me =(.

sooo...i spent time in the gym =)

the guoman hotel gyms really like a workout corner. 3 separate glass huts containing cardio machines, assisting weight machines and free weights respectively. it was pretty awesome cus i was like the only person in the gym. aside from Glen.

and it seems kinda sad that i spent a vacation...gymming. but i got quite alot done.

now 2.4s 9:35. just 1 min 5 seconds left to shave off.

aside from that, it was kinda just a nice 4 days to make new friends...and get to know old ones better.

ohhh i watched this show on the second night there. at least a little of it.

its called Elizabethtown. its pretty cool. first thing i saw when i watched it was these 2 dudes in bathrobes hugging. and one of them was Orlando Bloom. thats pretty much enough to get me hooked.

its one of those shows with its own culture. and its real addictive.

I don't need that girl by my side
I don't need that girl in my life
I don't want to talk it out
or hold her when she cries
I don't want to tell her
that I love her more than life
more than life

Sunday, June 15, 2008

church camp 11th-14th. kinda passed real fast.

it was kinda quiet. cus it was like 1/3 the size of the 06 one. but i guess in a smaller setting God still worked His ways. and maybe in that smaller setting it seemed easier to see Him and be with Him more intimately.

and those acoustic worship sessions really had a different kind of impact.

i dont wanna ruin it...so ill post about it some other time. but a song really said something to me.

Let now the weak say I have strength
By the spirit of God
That raised Christ from the dead
Let now the poor stand and confess
That my portion is Him
And I'm more than blessed

Let now Your church shine as Your bride
That You saw in Your heart
As You offered up Your life
Let now the lost be welcomed home
By the saved and redeemed
Those adopted as Your own

Let now our hearts burn with a flame
A fire consuming all
For Your Son's holy name
And with the heavens we declare
You are our king

We love You, Lord
We worship You
You are our God
You alone are good
You asked Your son
To carry this
The heavy cross
Our weight of sin

So I love You, Lord
I worship You
Hope which was lost
Now stands renewed
I give my life
To honour this
The love of Christ
The Saviour King

Saviour King
Hillsong
Saviour King

He is our portion, more than ever enough for us. and for that truth, we offer all we have in His service.

there is nothing like His love.