I give my all to You

Saturday, January 19, 2008

im HOME!!!

yeahhh. china was pretty tough. i cant believe i didnt like it when Lawrence told me the temperature had risen. im never gonna like cold countries again.

got there at 10+ on saturday morning. there was a flight delay and all so i spent 4 hours with Kenneth Westcott and the pyramid + 1. felt pretty good to get back with my old class.

i really miss them.

flew of to shanghai at 5.30. couldnt sleep on the stupid plane so i listened to the 3 albums i brought over and over again. thank goodness they were good ones. arrived and felt the cold. it wasnt all that bad at first cus it was only like 7degrees. it was kinda nice actually. especially seeing your breath condense into steam when you breathe or speak.

ate lunch and stuff. kinda liked china food then. i sure dont now.

went to see some show about the song dynasty then went for dinner at this funky place. checked into the hotel after that. i kinda liked the first hotel. it had a nice bathtub.

tried doing situps in the bathtub. stupid idea.

went to some tomb the next day wearing only 2 layers of clothes. and it was dead cold so i was dying until Moghan lent me his sweater. hes a great teacher.

busted my elbow there falling off the side of a staircase cus Patrick shoved me off. still hasnt healed. hope it isnt a fracture or anything.

spent the next few days or so touring around and seeing stuff that i really cant remember. began liking the food a little less.

fell sick on Kwok Wais birthday. forgot which day that is. started puking and stuff in the morning and got a super high fever. felt like fainting during the silk factory tour so Dennis Sim brought me to the room of the manager of the restaurant we were supposed to have lunch in so i could sleep. the manager came in and the tour guide and some other chinese people and they started talking really loud about how sick i was and how i needed peace so i could rest.

pretty ironic now i think of it. i didnt really have the consciousness to then.

brought to the hospital and was put on a IV drip. apparently they stick you with a needle for 3 hours when you get a fever there. felt a little better afterwards so Dennis Sim brought me back. hes a really good teacher.

dang it i shouldve taken chem.

started liking china a little less after that. spent the next few days touring around. 2 unfortunate incidents with Ben. i have to say i see him in a different light now.

got home last night. swore id never hate singapore again.

i guess the trip did help in class bonding and all. i did get to know Ryan Goh and Nick Ong alot better...and the rest of the class a little more. although there are a few aspects of the social behavior of my class that i dont wholeheartedly approve of and wouldnt participate it...i wouldnt condemn them like i would have when id met them. God sent me a message last night in the form of a devotional passage...and i guess now i dont have an excuse not to try to get along with them.

maybe friends are who you never thought could be. and who you thought was your friend might not be all they seem.

so i brought nothing back from the trip besides a pair of converses, a busted elbow and tonsilitis. which means i cant do much with my left arm or my voice for awhile. dang it.

this songs been put up here before...but in a different, more bitter light. it used to be an anthem of hate. i listened to it alot during the trip...but i dont wanna say its dedicated to it cus it isnt. its meant so much more to me before that. and maybe i finally see it now as what Bono meant it to be but its always been an anthem. just now its in a different colour.

See the stone set in your eyes
See the thorn twist in your side
I wait for you

Sleight of hand and twist of fate
On a bed of nails she makes me wait
And I wait without you

With or without you
With or without you

Through the storm, we reach the shore
You give it all but I want more
And I'm waiting for you

With or without you
With or without you
I can't live
With or without you

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away

My hands are tied, my body bruised
She got me with nothing to win
And nothing else to lose

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away

With or without you
With or without you
I can't live
With or without you

We'll shine like stars in the summer night
We'll shine like stars in the winter light
one heart, one hope, one love

With or without you
With or without you
I can't live
With or without you

With or Without You
U2
The Joshua Tree

the last verse there isnt in the studio recording featured. neither was it in the last time i put up these lyrics.

the words of this song kinda represent my initial understanding of the song...and dyed gloomy purple last time they really spoke a message of detest. but that one verse that Bono sang only live on certain occasions showed what he truly knew of the song. it was the reason why he cried out after the second chorus. the reason why he pulled people from the audience and hugged and kissed them onstage. the reason why millions of people across the world were touched by this song.

this song is an anthem. an anthem of love.